July 2010
6 posts
12 tags
A Rite of Passage
Every culture has its own path to adulthood. It could be a ritual, the end of education, or even mandated by law. Adulthood is a terrifying ultimatum for children of all ages - a strict rule that says “You are now an adult. You must follow the rules. You must act mature. You must take responsibility.” I shudder every time I think about it. I’ve realized now, however, that my path...
5 tags
3 tags
Less Wise than Yesterday
Yesterday I got my wisdom teeth out. After freaking out for the half hour before the procedure, I was consciously sedated against my will (not for anything, but I wanted to be OUT. Not awake, not aware, OUT). So I was aware they were ripping four teeth out of my head. Naturally, I was freaked out when they brought me to the “recovery room.” At this point, I was talking to my father,...
4 tags
4 tags
It's so hot...
How hot is it?
Well, let’s start with this: It’s hotter in my hometown than it is in Las Vegas. I live in Connecticut. I demand that the gratuitous amount strippers, hookers, neon lights, and casinos are moved here immediately. It’s so hot that Satan walked into town and spontaneously combusted. Police are still wondering what exactly Cher was doing here. It’s so hot that...
4 tags
“The essence of all jokes, of all comedy, seems to be an honest or well intended...”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson