February 2011
7 posts
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January 2011
23 posts
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For Loko
This will be my first experience with 4-Loko. Because I’m a little bit hungover from last night’s drinking experience and I’ve got a little cold, I’ve chosen the “Orange Blend.”
Cracking the can, the distinct aroma of ambiguous citrus permeates the air. Let’s see how this goes.
It tastes like a mimosa! Holy shit!
1:31 - I’ve finished about a...
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To the roommates who do not replace the toilet...
Why one should replace the roll of toilet paper
It has come to my attention that several people in this apartment have neglected to replace the roll of toilet paper onto the roll attached to the cabinet. In my opinion, these people are COMMUNISTS who neglect the American dream.
The American dream itself is a curious thing that can mean many things to many people. However, for those who do not...
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“Finally, there’s Mr. Obama’s sweet eulogy to little Christina. Anyone not...”
– —Robert Knight, real live asshole, writing for the Washington Times.
On the other hand:
Nine-year-old Isaac Saldana of Tucson, Ariz., was so upset when he heard about the shootings in his hometown that he felt compelled to do something in response.
“Me and my brother were about to go walk the...
“Human beings are flawed individuals. The cosmic bakers took us out of the oven a...”
– Jimmy Buffett “Fruitcakes”
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Kill Your Television, Volume 1
The television in our apartment broke over break, so instead, me and my two roommates have no other option than to engage in stimulating conversation to entertain us.
Tonight’s Topics:
Can vegans eat human semen? Verdict: Depends on whether the individual believes the human to be an animal that is exploited.
What is the likelihood of the Zombie apocalypse (Z-Paw)? Verdict: High.
How...
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Translation
In English: McClanahan Street.
In French:
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Drinking Problem
Dad: We have a drinking problem.
Me: Don't think of it as a drinking problem, think of it as a drinking solution.
Dad: The problem is the people who think it's a problem.
Me: Their problem is that they don't drink.
“Bacon-wrapped steak? So not only do we eat food before our food and then after...”
– Uttered by my father during a commercial about Golden Corral’s bacon-wrapped steak.
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“We hear every damn day about how fragile our country is - on the brink of...”
– Jon Stewart - The Rally to Restore Sanity Closing Speech (via mymissus)
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