Notecards.
Originally Posted 3/15/2009.
It’s been a few, but I’ve got something good.
My dad was moving all of the furniture and boxes of shit out of my grandmother’s apartment when I was on my way home for spring break. When I walked in the house, I found piles of stuff crammed into our garage. I started to help go through it. While doing so, I found fifteen 3x5 notecards with what looks like a church sermon written (in my grandmother’s handwriting) on them.
Allow me to share the cards (along with witty commentary).
Will you come with me on a journey into the future? Using your imagination
let us travel ahead to the year 1970. Not really very far away is it?
Actually, that’s like 40 years ago, so yeah, it’s pretty far.
Communism rules what is left of the world. The great bombs have destroyed
the cities and millions of people. Afterwards they came -
Kind of a dismal future for us, huh?
took away our leaders, teachers, pastors and anyone who dared speak out as
a Christian. All the Bibles were burned, every church and sign of religion wiped
out.
…
No more crosses silhouetted against the sky and no church bells ring. The
youth must not be reminded of these once cherished things.
Wait…are we in the past or the future? Or are we in the present? I’m so
confused.
We are a small group of Christians secretly meeting in the basement of a
bombed out building. Be sure no light can be seen from outside! Watch the door
someone!
Do you think there was someone listening to this and panicking because
they thought she wanted them to watch the door while she was talking about this?
“Hey, is anyone watching the fucking door!? THE WINDOWS ARE WIDE OPEN!!”
We are in great danger coming here to-night. I really didn’t expect so many
of you. We all feel that no matter how great the risk we must come
together,
This is shelter. We’re gonna take it no matter what danger we’re in. We
can’t get shit from these Commies.
pray together and preserve what we can of God’s word.
We did a crappy job then, since they burned all the Bibles.
We are always hungry now and our hearts ache to see our children growing
thin. We are cold too and know that Christmas will be here soon.
At least it’s not like today where children are growing fat. Apparently we
didn’t see the obesity epidemic coming.
Oh! What a joyous time that used to be! Dare we tell the children the
story…we must try! The beautiful story in Luke must not be lost to the world
and future generations.
But…they BURNED ALL THE BIBLES.
Do you think that if we try - together we could remember the words from the
Bible we have heard so many times.
I don’t know? Is this a question? Or are you our dictator and telling us
to remember?
Cards 11-15 go on to quote Luke 2:1-14.
It sounds like Christmas at the Connor household.
“Are you Sarah Connor? Are you Sarah Connor? I have a fruitcake for you. And I have a bike for John! Ho Ho Ho! This is like movie I was in with Sinbad and little Anakin Skywalker from Star Wars.”
BOOM!
